SULE AYGOREN: How did you get your start in the business and have you always wanted to do this?

BROOKE DENIHAN BARRETT: My start in the business was very much serendipity because it is a family business. But my career track was the mommy track. As soon as I was old enough to learn, I was taught to sew at the family cleaners and dyers, not necessarily because I was interested in it, but more because that was what was expected of girls and young women at the time. This had absolutely nothing to do with commercial real estate, but that was where I was career tracking. And then I got divorced in my 20s, had two kids and knew I had to go back to work. So, I went into the business and worked in many different areas in the hotels, and learned that I really liked that aspect of it and I was good at it.

ELLLEN BROWN: Growing up, hotels always fascinated me. Every time you check into a hotel it's a new adventure, right? After I graduated from college, I worked on the opening team of a hotel in operation. I quickly realized that I wasn't good at it and was anxious to be part of the bigger picture - creating a business and adding value to it.

I was fortunate to work for several advisory firms. As an advisor, I had access to all industry stakeholders: owners, lenders, brands. My advisory work prepared me well to move into the principal side of the business. For me, working on the real estate side of the hospitality business is fascinating. Every deal is different, every city is different, every property is different.

AYGOREN: How did you manage the work/life balance or harmony or synchronicity, whatever you want to call it?

DENIHAN BARRETT: I don't know if you call it managing or not, because there were many points in my life that I just threw myself into work and I don't think I could be where I was today if I didn't do that. Now do you call that balance or is it more a prioritizing what needs to be done at the moment?

BROWN: There are moments where it's all about work and there are moments when it's about family. Your priorities, honestly, shift. I always say, it takes a village. You need your village to get you through: the professional village, which is people within your work environment; and your personal village, which is that community at home that gets the kids to school. And there are days when it just doesn't work. But, you make it work.

AYGOREN: In a lot of other places, particularly on Wall Street, disparity still exists and women still earn less than men. Having so many women in high-level positions, is that something you're cognizant of or sensitive to?

DENIHAN BARRETT: We're fortunate in this company to have a good balance. I wouldn't say it's a 50/50 balance but we have a good balance of women working in this company. If you don't have a diverse workforce, I don't think there's good balance.

BROWN: I will share one thing, and it's very indicative of Denihan. When I was interviewing for a position here many years ago, it was a long process because it was a new position. Midway through the interview process I learned that I was expecting my second child. I struggled with whether or not I should continue with the interview process. I called a friend of mine who was a labor attorney and she told me I didn't need to say anything. I decided it would be unfair to not disclose that information.

So I called Brooke's former partner, Dan Denihan, and told him that I was going to excuse myself from the interview process and hopefully they would consider me for other roles in the future. He asked why, and I told him I was expecting my second and with it being a new job…he said, “Whoa, that happens to women all the time! It happened to my wife five times!” Denihan hired me. And I probably worked for two weeks before I went into labor early. Denihan's belief in and commitment to me is indicative of the kind of company it is and I am fortunate to part of it.

AYGOREN: You helped take Denihan through a major transition. Looking back, what do you think are the key elements that helped you come out of the whole process content and successful?

DENIHAN BARRETT: At one point I worked with six other family members and then five, I was the only female. How did everyone come out of it content? Because we looked at both the business side and the family side. I think we all walked away feeling like we got a fair deal and, more importantly, we all walked away still talking to one another.

BROWN: I think Brooke is being very modest about it. It takes business and personal savvy to negotiate a deal with your family and then sit down for Christmas dinner together—it's an amazing feat. The Denihans were smart thing and brought in advisors to help them on the family side, to make sure that they could get there emotionally. So many families have had horrible breakups over things like this.

AYGOREN: Obviously, mentorship is very important in any business, be it a female mentor or a male mentor. But, can you talk about your experiences a little, how important it was to you and how you're trying to give back?

DENIHAN BARRETT: When I started work there were no mentors. I had a lot of people that I observed over time and for me it was trial and error: you learned what worked and what didn't work. And it was probably just as important to have a bad boss as it was a good one because you learned what not to do. And when I first started I thought the way you got things done was to be very aggressive and look for the negatives and not be encouraging people. And I learned over time that the carrot works better than the stick.

BROWN: I would say if you have one mentor in your career, you're lucky. I've had a couple, many men. To be a really good mentor, you have to put aside your own ego and your own wishes and help that person get to the next step.

AYGOREN: In both the business itself as well as the workplace culture, what is the biggest difference you notice in the industry from when it started and to today?

DENIHAN BARRETT: It's different in reverse. I think people are a lot more understanding if someone needs to leave at 2 o'clock to go to their kid's soccer game. And the whole thing about operating remotely, I think people are working more hours today than they were before. You can balance but it's hard to really unplug at times.

BROWN: The hotel business has changed so much since when I graduated from school in the '80s. There weren't public REITs and there really weren't private equity firms buying portfolios of hotels. It really was the major brands and then independent hotels. And the independent hotels were always owned by whoever was the operator. The business structure of our business has changed tremendously over the last 25 years.

AYGOREN: What's the one piece of advice you'd give to a young woman, or a man, entering the business today?

DENIHAN BARRETT: You have to be committed and work hard and promote yourself. I think women still have a tendency to be too modest and humble. And I don't mean being a braggart or arrogant, but having a good sense of yourself and that you know what you can do.

BROWN: I echo everything Brooke said—believe in yourself. I often think about what a mentor once said to me: what would you do if you weren't afraid? Have goals and believe that you can achieve them.

DENIHAN BARRETT: My motto recently has been—what's the worst that could happen?

FAST FACTS

Movie you could watch three times in a row?
DENIHAN BARRETT: Ordinary People and the Joy Luck Club.
BROWN: I happen to love the Princess Bride. I think it's hilarious. Another would be the Shawshank Redemption.

Favorite book?
DENIHAN BARRETT: I change books a lot, but I read a lot of historical fiction.
BROWN: One of my all-time favorite books is To Kill a Mockingbird.

Favorite meal?
BROWN: That's not a fair question.
DENIHAN BARRETT: This is hard, I just love food.

Favorite vacation spot?
BROWN: Every adventure. That's part of the fun of the hospitably business.
DENIHAN BARRETT: There are so many places, but if we're talking luxury, Positano, Italy, is just gorgeous.

What's one surprising thing about you?
DENIHAN BARRETT: I have nine grandchildren. Memorial Day and July 4th, we had 22 people at our house. And I cook for them all. I love it.
BROWN: I also come a big family. I'm number five out of 10 kids—super middle child syndrome, right? Competition was daily life so, there isn't really anything anyone could possibly say to me that my brothers and sisters haven't already said in much clearer terms.